The Doris Day Forum

The Doris Day Web Forum - an unofficial forum for fans of Doris Day.
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Jas1
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Re: The Doris Day Forum

Unread post by Jas1 » 12 Jun 2019, 08:18

Paul - lovely to see you back and read your insightful words.

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Re: The Doris Day Forum

Unread post by jmichael » 12 Jun 2019, 08:31

What a thrill it was to see Paul's long awaited return to the forum.

Paul, Howard and others make compelling points about the importance of preserving her legacy. The forum has become the Doris Day Wikipedia of information about all facets of her entertainment career. Just take a look at the extensive discography that Texas, Peter and others have compiled over the years. Where else would anyone go to understand how prolific and diverse her recording career was? Where else would you find Judy's exhaustive research into little known facts about her recordings and films, or Johnny's enthusiastic observations about various critical appraisals of her films? Where else would anyone find the stunning banners that Puck, Bryan and others have created? Then consider the parade of rare, high quality photos that Peter, Ania, Howard and others have generously shared over the years. All of that originated here and you will glimpse many of the same photos on social media fan pages because people know where to look for them: right here.

Over time, the forum has evolved into a tight-knit community of well informed, serious admirers who understand and respect each other. As Paul mentioned, the road has been bumpy at times, but thanks to Bryan's astute leadership and the spirit of respect and courtesy demonstrated by its members, the forum has endured and the historic components are a virtual roadmap of what made Doris Day an unforgettable artist.

Bryan, I hear you loud and clear. I'm sure the amount of time and expense has become problematic for you. I wonder if we could brainstorm ways to preserve the historical components and retain a scaled back topical section to give members a place to comment on new things. It's likely there will be a number of books published in the near future and while some of those may trigger old wounds or spark controversy, I can easily see us wanting a safe space to share reactions and process the information.

I'm still working through the grieving process but I am more open to hanging around, if we can find a way to alleviate the workload on you and keep the lights on.

Michael
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Re: The Doris Day Forum

Unread post by doris-day-fan » 12 Jun 2019, 17:02

Just want to add my thanks to Bryan for ALL he has done for us over the years and I totally agree with everything Paul Brogan said so well...we are like a family - The Day Gang...how wonderful that Doris brought us all together. Bryan you have done such a fabulous job over the many years of keeping us up to date on so many things - God bless you for ALL you have done for us. Just want to say a BIG THANK YOU to you Bryan and to Paul and ALL who contribute to this awesome forum. Doris's spirit lives on for sure - she was and continues to be such a role model for me, and I am sure for many others.
Yesterday I gave my DAY TO REMEMBER - DORIS DAY presentation and it was a joy to share my story with those in attendance. It is always wonderful to connect with others who love Doris.
All I can say is THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU Bryan!!!!
Mary Anne
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Re: The Doris Day Forum

Unread post by webmaster » 24 Jul 2019, 10:18

Thank you all for your kind words and devotion to Doris. I've now thought about this long and hard and discussed it over a long period with Michael and Paul, who have been very supportive and understanding.

It's been a very special place covering almost 20 years. I started it in 2000 and five years were lost when I moved it to another server in May 2005, so Buttercup, it probably was the same forum you mentioned. Many people here joined in 2005, Michael, Jas, Howard, Ania, Peter, Mary Anne, etc, who still post. I notice I've made 6918 posts! So I've spent a good part of my time on here in those years.

The bottom line for me now is that I feel I need to move on. I always said I would continue as long as Doris was with us. Sometimes that has felt a bit of a burden and I wondered if I could manage it but felt I'd made that promise. The achievements we've made collectively in documenting Doris' career and life are amazing - and here I think that we'd all agree that Peter Flappers photos play a big part in that. I've come to the conclusion that when I see a particularly large number of visitors shown that many must be people looking for photos. If you search for DD photos you're bound to find yourself on the forum.

And, related to that, as Michael has rightly pointed out, the current situation is that it's kept going by the efforts of a relatively small group of people. I explained to Paul and Michael that even if I'm not on here very often the software still needs to be maintained and updated and the cost of running it is not insignificant But these things are secondary to the feeling I have that I need to move on.

It doesn't mean we can't keep in touch and perhaps one of you would consider starting a new board or discussion group. I was hoping to persuade you all to come on to Twitter - maybe some of you will reconsider? Happy to assist anyone who needs help.

I don't mind if it runs for another few months if some of that time can be used to think about alternatives and for people to save things they'd like to keep and discuss what I've said and how you feel about it.

I feel a bit sad and guilty about this but I hope we can still look forward to some happy Days ahead.

Bryan x
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jmichael
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Re: The Doris Day Forum

Unread post by jmichael » 24 Jul 2019, 10:51

Bryan,

I think we all understand how you feel.

I would be remiss if I did not publicly thank you for all the joy, camaraderie and information the forum has given me since 2005. You created a safe harbor where fellow Dayniacs could gather and share their opinions, photos, videos, and other information without judgement or censorship. In the realm of Fan Forums, I think you are unique by creating something that stands completely on its own as a comprehensive resource for all things Doris. I love the idea of archiving it in a secure yet accessible place on the Internet. I can't imagine that anyone would attempt a meaningful analysis of her career without coming here to gather the facts.

Bravo, bravo, bravo!

Finally, let go of the guilt - you've done a marvelous job and we are the beneficiaries of your immense talent and generosity.

Hugs From Across The Pond,
Michael
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Re: The Doris Day Forum

Unread post by paul » 24 Jul 2019, 11:59

Bryan - I will second everything that Michael so perfectly stated.

I found the older Forum around 2002 or 2003 and remember feeling as though I'd stumbled on a secret treasure. Within weeks, those who posted became members of my extended family and I looked forward to anything and everything they wished to share. You Bryan, became a hero to me for making this outlet available to everyone and when we segued to the current Forum, we became even more of a family.

We shared our losses when a member would pass away, became frustrated and annoyed sometimes when someone posted something we didn't like and celebrated the good fortune of members or when someone would share a particularly wonderful picture with all of us. To this day I remain delighted, like a child on Christmas morning, when Peter or someone else posts a picture I've never seen before.

During our discussions recently, you and Michael have been frank and forthright - the way you've always been. It's not always easy to accept the reality of a situation but I've lived long enough to recognize that there comes a time when things change.

You have given tirelessly for nearly two decades, both financially and as the steward who has kept our ship afloat and maneuvered it through sometimes choppy seas. I am certain that at times it took a toll on your personal life, but still you persisted. We are ALL the better for your amazing work ethic and celebration of Doris. I feel certain that she'd have established an instant rapport with you if you'd ever met.

Thank you for announcing your intention in advance and to being open to helping those who wish to continue to put forth suggestions and ideas.

For me, this Forum has been a chapter of my life that I'll always treasure and never forget, whatever happens next. Sharing this journey with you and others who were only names at the journey's start but are now friends beyond the Forum, represents the best parts of being alive.

Bryan, you've given all of us a part of yourself and as such, you'll always occupy a special place in the hearts of many.

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Re: The Doris Day Forum

Unread post by Peter Flapper » 24 Jul 2019, 16:32

Hello Bryan, Michael & Paul,

Thank you all for your thoughts! I'm around for years on both websites, and it was and it is a second home on the web, for me! I loved all your contributions… And yes we lost a lot of people through the years, but their memory's live in us I think. I always found this a place among friends and I am blessed to be a part of this group. I hope to meet you all online or in real life. Que Sera Sera…

Bryan I'm so grateful for all the work you've done over the years. This forum and the website are amazing and there are days that I visit here more than once. But I do understand your feelings, it's been a long, long, long ride… (A great one, is my opinion) But again: A JOB WELL DONE I think Doris is very very proud! (And so am I)

At this moment Twitter and I aren't on a good foot… But time will work that out. Facebook works well for me and some of the stuff I posted here is around there on: Doris Day Today and Always.

I will continue to post till the end... If I find something to post that's interesting/rare.

See you all around,

Peter

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Re: The Doris Day Forum

Unread post by Musiclover » 24 Jul 2019, 20:51

Bryan, I say "Hear, hear!" and "Amen!" to the thoughts Michael, Paul, and Peter have expressed. Can't improve on those . . . but I do want to extend my sincere thanks for the privilege you afforded me to write about the music aspect of Doris's career -- and for your patience with my lack of computer knowledge. (For the latter, you deserve a medal!)

Stay well and happy, friend.

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Jas1
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Re: The Doris Day Forum

Unread post by Jas1 » 25 Jul 2019, 01:15

Bryan

All I can say is thank you and confirm that I totally respect your decision .

I have joined you on Twitter but I never got Twitter - I much prefer Facebook - however, i will continue to pop in on T.

Time to say goodnight? :x :x :x

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Re: The Doris Day Forum

Unread post by howard » 25 Jul 2019, 10:58

I'm so grateful to you, Bryan for maintaining this fabulous web site for all these years. My day would be incomplete without at least one look each and every morning. The photos, facts, music, etc. have made this an incredibly valuable tool for us fans and for researchers alike. It must have taken a herculean effort to maintain, not to mention the financial end of it. You have been a blessing to us all ... THANK YOU!
Like Irene Dunne done.

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Re: The Doris Day Forum

Unread post by webmaster » 25 Jul 2019, 16:00

Thanks, Howard, Jas, Judy, Peter, Paul and Mary, I mean, Michael! :) I really appreciate all your comments but I think you're giving me far too much praise (stop already!). I didn't do it on my own, you seem to be forgetting it's always been a team effort. I was just lucky enough to find people who felt the same way about Doris that I did. Rather like Paul says. We're all equal so please no more praise, it embarrasses me a little,'

Let's get practical. I can see I've presented you with a problem. Let's explore solutions. If I could just hand it over and forget about it, I'd be up for that. When I say 'forget' I'm talking about the business of administrating it, I'd still be happy to visit. But I don't know if any of you are ready. willing and able? I could help. At some stage, you'd have to pay the cost for hosting it. That might not make it so much fun - or it might make you feel more involved?

Other thoughts - could we keep the group together with a blog? Someone suggested pairing the forum back. just using certain sections, etc.

I'll just leave those thoughts for openers and see what people think.

And, Johnny, we haven't heard anything from you?
Follow Remembering Doris Day: https://twitter.com/DayRemembering

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Re: The Doris Day Forum

Unread post by Ania » 26 Jul 2019, 09:51

I can not imagine closing the forum, for me this forum is something wonderful and I would be sad if the forum was closed forever... I do not have Twitter accounts and I will not create such an account, I do not want to! This forum is, has been and I hope it will be such a refuge for me, because here faithful fans of Doris meet and discuss. Real fans who share their knowledge and everything that concerns Doris. Facebook is not the same, I prefer our Bryan forum. Bryan this forum is for the faithful, real Doris fans!

Greetings from Poland :D Ania
I LOVE YOU DORIS♥

“You haven't lived until you've lived with a cat.” Doris Day
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paul
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Re: The Doris Day Forum

Unread post by paul » 31 Jul 2019, 12:21

In response to Ania, I agree about this Forum being quite special and for the most part, our "meetings" here have always been so civilized, informative and classy, as one would expect from Doris Day admirers.

With a few exceptions when things got a little tense about a decade or so ago, those on the Forum have shared wonderful thoughts, feelings, ideas, and pieces of themselves. That's what sets it apart from Facebook - and no offense to the wonderful sites for Doris on Facebook, but sometimes you dash off a quick response on Facebook without thinking it through. On the Forum, there have been so many deeply felt messages, written with so much heart. It has built connections and those connections will be difficult to separate from.

I hope members are pondering various forms that our unique connection can continue.

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Jas1
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Re: The Doris Day Forum

Unread post by Jas1 » 01 Aug 2019, 05:38

Very apt words Paul

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jmichael
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Re: The Doris Day Forum

Unread post by jmichael » 03 Aug 2019, 06:57

I don't know what else to say on this topic.

We've already seen a number of articles, tributes, and special screenings of her films since she passed and there will more of the same in the future. Her films and recordings were terribly underrated and she never received the acclaim she deserved. New things will be coming that this small band of devoted fans will want to discuss.

Bryan, is there a way for you to reduce the workload and financial burden on you without shutting the entire forum down?

Could we have a General Discussion section for new topics and a Photo section where Peter, Ania, Howard and others could share rare photos? The rest could be archived for posterity and used only as a reference site.

I'm just brainstorming possible ways to keep the lights on and respect your wishes.

Michael
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Re: The Doris Day Forum

Unread post by Johnny » 04 Aug 2019, 17:25

I have been trying to think about how we DD Forum members can support Bryan and keep this valuable forum going.

I have imagined the posts being compiled by members into a book with individual introductions written for each chapter. Each chapter would focus on one topic, with a forum member taking the lead for the chapter. The chapter subjects may include Doris Day Songs, Doris Day Films, Doris Day Television Show, Doris Day Photos,
Doris Day Animal Advocacy, Doris Day Fashions, Doris Day Albums, Doris Day Memories or whatever interests members.

Obviously, Bryan and forum members would need to approve and support the project. A large part of the book is already written in the posts.

This idea may be blue sky thinking and need more development , but it may create a new energy for forum members. Perhaps it may serve to promote entirely new creative ideas to continue to honour the life and work of Doris Day.

Just a thought.
Johnny

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Re: The Doris Day Forum

Unread post by webmaster » 05 Aug 2019, 18:23

Well, I'm very pleased to see you comment at last, Johnny. I was particularly concerned about how you'd feel if the forum closed as you are probably the most active posting member (along with Peter) I think, and I like your ideas.

BTW, I've been at the coast again for the past four days so apologies for the delay in answering all of you sooner. Michael wisely said (paraphrase) that I've been sending mixed messages and it's fair to say that it's one thing making a decision and another living with the consequences for people you have affection for and have shared many treasured experiences, even though they are 'online'.

Here's my compromise, out of consideration for the friends we've made but will probably never meet in this world, (but that's okay!) we keep the forum going for the rest of 2019 and review the situation in the New Year. If between you, you can organise yourselves (I will do less but still contribute and manage the behind-the-scenes maintenance) and if YOU feel it's a task you can do and want to continue doing, so be it. You might want to discuss this in the member's forum, maybe appoint a guest webmaster, other roles, more ideas etc.

If it's just a dwindling number of people involved, we may have to question if it's really worth it. But if you can make it work, I'll support you.
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Re: The Doris Day Forum

Unread post by Johnny » 05 Aug 2019, 20:31

Thank you Bryan!

I certainly appreciate knowing the Doris Day Forum may continue to the end of the year. I would like to think we will not abandon Doris but continue to contribute to her beautiful legacy.

I hope Bryan you will feel in time a sense of peace and comfort. I recall you commenting that you felt at times that Doris was a substitute mom. I believe we share a similar experience in losing our own mothers when we were young. My own mother had Doris' sunny disposition. I always felt Doris was an extended family member because her music filled our home. Our family never missed her movies when they came to town. I have countless treasured memories that live on.

I sincerely believe in the importance of this forum in keeping Doris Day's work and humanity alive.
There are many creative possibilities and ideas but it will be determined by the interest and commitment of the members. We will know more in time. Hopefully we will hear more from members. Summer is a time when many people are away. I have noticed when I log on that there are usually twenty to thirty people on this site, mostly guests.

I hope Bryan you will not feel pressure of any kind concerning this forum . I want to thank you for your amazing leadership and hard work in making this forum possible for everyone who loves Doris Day.
Johnny

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Re: The Doris Day Forum

Unread post by jbeane » 06 Aug 2019, 15:45

It's hard to add anything to the wonderful comments, ideas, and suggestions that have been posted here. Bryan, don't ever feel one ounce of guilt - you have given so much to all of us and worked tirelessly to make this a safe and wonderful place to land each day!
I would love to see all of this information archived. Michael do you know how we would go about doing that for starters. Then to ease the financial burden could we charge for a membership? It would be wonderful if we could give back something to Bryan and have money to keep a smaller version going forward. An annual membership would make sure that the serious fans would have a safe palce to be. I also don't know how you go about setting that up, but I could do some research. Thanks for keeping it open until the end of the year - hopefully we can come up with some solution.
Best,
Jill
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jmichael
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Re: The Doris Day Forum

Unread post by jmichael » 08 Aug 2019, 06:25

Bryan, thank you for extending the deadline and allowing the forum to continue a bit longer.

I'll post occasionally but not on a regular basis going forward. Still, I appreciate your generosity and understanding. The DD Forum is one of a kind. As Paul mentioned, I have nothing against Facebook or Twitter, but social media doesn't foster in-depth discussions whereas the forum provides ample space for serious fans to express their thoughts and opinions. What's more, you've managed to set a respectful tone that makes it a warm and inviting place to visit. Oops, there I go again, laying another compliment on you. My bad!

I'll be seeing you.

Cheers,
Michael
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Re: The Doris Day Forum

Unread post by jmichael » 08 Aug 2019, 06:27

jbeane wrote:
06 Aug 2019, 15:45
It's hard to add anything to the wonderful comments, ideas, and suggestions that have been posted here. Bryan, don't ever feel one ounce of guilt - you have given so much to all of us and worked tirelessly to make this a safe and wonderful place to land each day!
I would love to see all of this information archived. Michael do you know how we would go about doing that for starters. Then to ease the financial burden could we charge for a membership? It would be wonderful if we could give back something to Bryan and have money to keep a smaller version going forward. An annual membership would make sure that the serious fans would have a safe palce to be. I also don't know how you go about setting that up, but I could do some research. Thanks for keeping it open until the end of the year - hopefully we can come up with some solution.
Best,
Jill
Jill, no idea, sorry but I think Bryan is the only person who understands the technology well enough to answer your question.

Hugs,
Michael
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Jas1
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Re: The Doris Day Forum

Unread post by Jas1 » 08 Aug 2019, 10:30

All sound suggestions and approaches - let's put our thinking caps/cats on!

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Re: The Doris Day Forum

Unread post by webmaster » 10 Aug 2019, 16:27

Thanks for your suggestion, Jill! I was going to repost them but to save time I'll just reply. I don't think charging a membership fee is very practical, plus I've paid it already and it's money spent so I don't need it back. But thank you for the thought. I was, maybe still am, a member of a forum where the person who ran it asked people who used it for a contribution each year when the hosting fees became due so that would be a better option, I think.

But, it's still a big effort keeping this ship afloat and you may all feel different in a few months time so let's see how it goes.

I like the idea of 'streamlining' (my interpretation) the posting. People do tend to start new topics when it's not really necessary. I tried several times to point people to a catch-all topic, such as Small Talk but it hasn't worked. If you go here viewforum.php?f=1 you'll see topics that have had no replies or only 1,2,3,4,5,6 replies: I won't name the people who do it the most but have a look and see if you qualify! :)
How about if we start a new section, rather like a blog and everything goes into that? Unless there is a good reason why it shouldn't?

That's my initial response - getting tired now, will say more soon. Thanks to all of you. And where is Robert these days?
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Re: The Doris Day Forum

Unread post by doris-day-fan » 10 Aug 2019, 20:17

Dear Bryan,
I hope all is well with you - can't thank you enough for ALL you have done for us over the past years to bring Doris to us in so many ways. We can't thank you enough for ALL you do.
I have recently connected with DORIS DAY FAN CLUB on Facebook run by an avid admirer of Doris, Cindy Nevin. I am doing a blog on it and will let you all know when it goes 'live'. Currently there are over 14,000 members from all over the world. It is wonderful that people around the world still have such great love for our Doris and want to connect with others who love Doris. Some of you may even be on this blog already - it is a closed group, but feel free to contact Cindy thru Facebook to join - it is always nice to hear from others who are admirers of our Doris. Thanks again Bryan for ALL you do and have done over the years to keep Doris with us. No one can fill your shoes, but just want you to know how grateful I am for your continued dedication to this wonderful Forum. Take care - big hugs, XO
"The BEST is yet to come."

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Re: The Doris Day Forum

Unread post by jmichael » 12 Aug 2019, 08:18

webmaster wrote:
10 Aug 2019, 16:27

I like the idea of 'streamlining' (my interpretation) the posting. People do tend to start new topics when it's not really necessary. I tried several times to point people to a catch-all topic, such as Small Talk but it hasn't worked. If you go here viewforum.php?f=1 you'll see topics that have had no replies or only 1,2,3,4,5,6 replies: I won't name the people who do it the most but have a look and see if you qualify! :)
How about if we start a new section, rather like a blog and everything goes into that? Unless there is a good reason why it shouldn't?
Bryan,

I agree. A General Section similar to a blog where members can create new topics should work. That would give members a place to comment on new books, tributes, articles, etc. in the future. I don't think we need to keep commenting on her films, recordings, or television series. Hasn't it all been said many times before? I would like to keep the Photos section too because Peter, Ania and others are brilliant about finding rare photos to share.

That's my two cents.
Michael
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